I’m back! I took a slight hiatus from all the stuff (newsletters, blogs, etc). I had a book to finish and the holidays to survive.

In an effort to get on a routine and continue on my “health journey”, as Ross has dubbed it, I have changed the way I eat and my relationship with food. That took a year to set in, really get in a habit of eating in a particular way and change my palate to crave less processed foods and sugars.

Now, I fear, that I’ll have to begin the second stage of this journey. I am actually going to have to EXERCISE. Booooo! I hate exercising with the fiery passion of a thousand suns. I really really hate it.

I have come to the conclusion that a low impact and relaxing sort of start is the way for me to go. If I can get in the habit of doing something every day for at least 30 minutes, it may have a better chance of sticking. Let’s be honest here, I’m not getting up in the morning to do any of this. Don’t get me wrong, in the morning would be ideal but I know myself and I’m not capable of that.

Back in the day, when I was going to the gym three or four times a week, I once got out of bed at the ass-crack of dawn…got dressed…put on shoes…then…went straight back to bed. I have paid for an entire year of gym memberships and then not gone ONCE. I can’t be trusted. I realize this about myself. I am not a morning person. I am not a person that will drive to a place-outside my home- to do a thing that I hate. NOPE. It’s just not going to happen. My only alternative is to do something at home.

I have two options.

  1. Bodyboss – which i have already purchased and have used in the past. The last time I did a workout from there, (and this was the pre-program…you know the stuff to get you ready for the real workouts) Scarlett asked me if I was going to be okay. I honestly answered that I didn’t know. So, maybe not jump into that one.
  2. Yoga – this seems like the more sustainable option at this point and doesn’t make me want to collapse in a sobbing heap of sweaty, disgusting flesh. So, there’s that.

There are some drawbacks to yoga. Maybe some of you know them. The most prevalent, at least for me, is the farting. Whatever is going on inside my body when I practice yoga, turns me into a stinky, disgusting, 90-year-old-man who’s eaten nothing but brussel sprouts and broccoli for days on end. It is repulsive, and loud, and almost shameful. I say almost, because really I have zero shame.

There is a second issue with yoga in my house that hadn’t really occurred to me until I actually attempted to do it. Practicing yoga with a 3.5 year old is almost like having a puppy or cat around. She’s crawling through my legs, lying on the mat while I’m in downward dog and staring up at me, throwing stuffed animals at me because they’re “going over the bridge”, wrapping a blanket around my legs and shouting “NOW YOU’RE TRAPPED!”.

So, at this point, I practice yoga to the risk of everyone in my house. Myself because of the probability of physical harm and everyone because they have a sense of smell.

#you’rewelcome #sorrynotsorry

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.