Manipulated by a Toddler

My daughter is too smart for her own good. Take the incident last night.

I’m not sure why every time she falls down, Scarlett hits her face. It’s like there’s there is a magnet somewhere in there that just attracts hard shit. She’d already fallen at daycare and busted her lip open which hadn’t healed completely yet. So, every time she eats something salty it hurts and she cries. Last night, she fell and smashed a plastic tea kettle into her face. One that she was holding in her hand, by the way.

Her lip started bleeding . . . again. We got a wet wash cloth and set about stopping the bleeding. While she was holding the wash cloth to her mouth, this is the conversation that followed.

Scarlett: I hurt my lip

Me: Yep, you sure did.

Scarlett: I think a Popsicle will help.

I’m trying desperately not to laugh out loud because everyone says you shouldn’t. And I know I shouldn’t but come on. That’s too smart. Too cute. And too hilarious.

Me: Oh, you do, do you?

Scarlett: Yeah.

Me: Well, that’s up to your daddy. You’ll need to ask him.

She promptly got up from my lap and trotted into the kitchen which is only about ten feet away. He’s standing there glaring at me.

Ross: Thanks!

I grinned and still tried not to laugh.

Scarlett: Daddy, can I have a popsicle? I hurt my lip. Oh please, oh please, oh please.

Ross: No, it’s too late for a popsicle

Scarlett promptly turned on her heels and headed back toward me. Her face scrunched up as she began to sob. Standing in front of me, hiccuping back tears, she started in on me.

Scarlett: I need a mommy hug.

I pulled her up into my lap and hugged her, hiding my face as I bit my lip.

Scarlett: Mommy, I really need a popsicle.

Me: Do you?

Scarlett: Well, that’s up to your daddy.

Ross: Audible sigh from the kitchen. 

Scarlett: Daddy, I really need a Popsicle. – she said through sniffles.

Ross: Okay, what color?

Scarlett: – Much perkier and with no sniffles – Green!

There you have it. Ross and I are in TROUBLE!

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