Okay, everyone’s bracket is busted. Its a fact. Some fared better than others.
In our house, we each did a bracket (Ross, Scarlett, and myself). In addition, Ross did a bracket that was all cat mascots and its aptly titled “All Cats”.
I lost to all of them. ALL. OF. THEM.
Even my 8 year old daughter who has never filled out a bracket before and who never watches basketball.
Here’s mine.
How did this happen? And of course, Ross blew us all away sitting at 83.3%.
This is my annual bitch session where I complain about how bad I’m doing with my bracket and the tournament overall. So, here we go.
My bracket is officially a piece of flaming shit.
This is a bunch of horseshit too because I’m the one in the house who actually watches the damned games.
I’m the bottom line in my group of two (Ross and me). Fucking 30th percentile. And this was before the games last night! GOD DMAN IT GONZAGA! You had one job. Every year, Ross wins and he doesn’t even watch anything! This year…nobody wins.
Plus, my Buckeyes lost in the second round. It wasn’t unexpected since they were playing Villanova but I still had hope. Especially when they brought it to within two points late in the game. Villanova is a great team and they gave it everything they had but still came up short. Maybe next year.
I love March Madness time. I don’t give a shit about football, or hockey, or baseball, or the NBA. College Basketball is on my calendar every year. I’m the idiot watching St. Mary’s games in October and November.
This year, I didn’t get to go sit at the bar with my friends to watch multiple games at the same time and talk trash. I’m really good at talking trash. It’s one of my favorite things to do. It’s a gift.
Usually, each year, I’m the only person with a vagina sitting at the table, mocking my friends for making prissy drink orders or rediculous substitutions. These are actual things I’ve heard around the table:
“Can you cook my wings for 18 minutes? Not 21, that’s too long.” – after this bombshell, an entire conversation took place about how long certain BW3 restauarants around town cooked their wings. It was like being in the Twilight Zone.
“I’ll have a Smirnoff Ice.” – this from a grown ass man in his late 30’s.
“If I eat that, i’ll feel it later.” – that shit doesn’t apply during March Madness. You eat it and suffer the consequences later. That’s just the way it is.
I missed all that shenaniganry this year. I have a new job and I couldn’t afford to take several vacation days only two weeks into starting. So I missed all the trash talking, all the mocking from people who’ve I’ve known for 20+ years.
I didn’t miss all of it. I got some of it over text message
Don’t judge me and my screenshots OR editing the photos. I’m still learning how to do shit on my new gigantic new Galaxy S22+. It’s a damned monster.
So, there you have it. Even though I couldn’t be there to give them shit in person. I still managed to do it via text. It’s not the same for sure, but still makes me feel like I’m part of the group.
It’s been a while. I know. I know. I’m supposed to be posting on Monday and Friday EVERY WEEK! And I’ve skipped *cough* three posts…maybe. Yes, I am a horrible blogger. But we all knew this already. Now that I’ve been properly chastised, can we discuss something really important. Ticketmaster.
I have purchased quite a few tickets lately which is so unlike me. Scarlett and I are going to A Charlie Brown Christmas next month, then I bought Ross Weezer/Pixie concert tickets (he’s going to make me go with him *sigh*), and then Disney’s Frozen on Ice – that’s right! I bought Disney on Ice tickets! I am not ashamed. Anyway, this means that I’ve gotten charged approximately $140 just in transaction/service fees. WHAT?!?
That’s just a rough estimate, by the way, it was probably more.
WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK, TICKETMASTER? Seriously. I don’t think I would feel so robbed if that was included in the price. When I’m looking at tickets and the price is $56 each, I think I’m paying $112 for two tickets which seems like a good deal. Then, you slap the service fees on there and suddenly it’s a $151.60. We won’t even talk about the Disney on Ice tickets where I bought three tickets.
The reason we’re talking about this is last night, Ross and I were looking at NCAA Tourney tickets. The first weekend is going to have games in Columubs. COLUMBUS! If you’ve read my blog regularly, you know I love college basketball. LOVE! I cannot express to you the amount of joy college basketball brings. I watch the stupid games where I have zero investment in November. The OSU men’s basketball schedule is on my calendar. Ross and I take days off at Tourney time to go to the bar and watch the games ALL DAY LONG. I cannot emphasize how much I love college hoops. Those tickets were (and these are the cheap ones) $198 EACH. That would mean that with the extra fees, we’d pay close to $500 for basketball tickets. I love basketball but I’m also cheap. I just don’t think I can justify $500. And now I’m incredibly sad.
Well, since I’m posting in March and the title of this blog is “My Favorite Month”, you can assume that it’s March. You would be right. This is true for several reasons.
My daughter was born in March. Just as a reminder of how stinkin’ cute she is. Here’s a photo.
March Madness! Need I say more. Also, my bracket was not busted. After two rounds of play, I’m at 93%. That’s right, cause I had Wisconsin winning. Ross is suitably impressed.
3. Shamrock Shakes. Let’s just take a moment and let that sink in. SHAMROCK SHAKES! Every year, the sugary sweetness of mint flavored milk calls to me. I feel about the shamrock shake like Ross feels about the McRib. Both are disgusting and will make you sick but you love them anyway. I wait, every year, for March to come around so I can suck down some minty goodness. The first McDonald’s I went through was a disappointment. Their shake machine was down. WTF? It’s shamrock shake time. Your shake machine cannot – and I repeat – CANNOT be down. So, on Friday (and on St. Patrick’s day too) I made a really bad choice. Not only did I get a Shamrock shake but I got a 20 piece chicken nugget as well.
Don’t worry. I paid for it later. Not only were the nuggets both delicious and disgusting – all at the same time. The problem is that not only were the nuggets a bad choice (covered in sweet & sour sauce. uh huh, you read that right) but I’m lactose intolerant. So there’s that.
Here’s the thing. I need to get another one before the end of March and they disappear for another year.
If you know anything about me, you know that March is my jam. I love the NCAA Tournament to an unhealthy level. Every year, Ross and I take the first Thursday and Friday off to sit at a bar and watch all the games. We drink. We swear. We make both intelligent and unintelligent conversation about what’s going on. Basically, in a group of our friends all consisting of men, I’m the only woman sitting at the bar. I’m usually the most vocal. This is what love is. Although, Ross refuses to go to a live game with me. He objects to my behavior. I say, if you don’t want your children to hear that type of language, don’t bring them to a sporting event. If nothing else, they’ll learn how to use swear words properly.
If you’re my friend, you’d also know that I love Buckeye basketball. Behind Walt Disney, Thad Matta is God. However, they sucked this year. SUCKED! Sucked to the point that I couldn’t watch them. It depressed me. I’m an angry fan. I expect the best and I get upset when my teams fall short of that expectation. Harsh? Perhaps. But that’s the way I roll. No apologies and no settling. My Buckeyes are not in the Tournament this year. That makes me sad but the reality of the situation is that I’d rather not be in it than be embarrassed.
So, regardless if my team is in the Big Dance or not, I’ve filled out my brackets (3 to be exact), I’m excited to hang out with my friends this week, and I’m excited for basketball.
Well, I was going to write today about how much I love March Madness and anyone who knows me, knows how CRAZY I get during this time of year. But today I am sad. I filled out my bracket with all the hopes in the world that OSU could put up a fight against Syracuse. It doesn’t really matter now does it? This is the most depressing sight in the world today!!!!!
Ohio State falls to the No. 11 Dayton Flyers, 60-59.
For what it’s worth, Dayton played a good game and the fact that the NCAA site kept crashing was driving me nuts, distracting me a bit from the actual game. Really NCAA???? At this juncture, you haven’t figured out that there’s going to be heavy traffic to your site in March? Anyway, for those interested…here’s my bracket. As you can see, I’m already in the hole.
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