For those of you that have children, you may have seen PJ Masks on Disney Junior. For those of you that haven’t ever seen this show, it’s basically about three kids, 6-9 years old, who have pajamas that turn them into superheros; Catboy, Owelette, and Gecko.

They fight three villains that are also 6-9 years old; Luna Girl, Romeo, and Night Ninja. If it sounds ridiculous, you’re right. It is. It’s a kids’ show.

However, let’s talk about this.

First, what parents don’t know that their kids are out and about at night? We have six kids (at the least) running around causing trouble. I say “at the least” because Night Ninja has a team of – I shit you not – ninjalinos that are smaller than he is. So, there’s a bunch of toddlers running around the city at night in addition to the above six. And noone knows! This city is, evidently, filled with neglectful parents. Also, when are these kids getting any sleep. These must be the most exhausted kids on the planet.

Second, they have a pretty sophisticated headquarters.

The amount of computer equipment and the transportation are well above what any regular kid would have access to. That thing has bay doors that open for the respective vehicles. Who is funding this? Where are they getting this stuff from? Also, how does no one notice a gigantic tower WITH A BRIDGE in the middle of an island in this city?

There are a couple of things to talk about regarding the heros. Clearly, Owelette is the smartest of the three. She gets ignored alot but that’s typical of female/male relationships. Poor Gecko seems to be the Butters of the group which just makes me feel bad for him but they at least listen to his ideas.

Catboy, the alpha of the group, is horrible though. He makes poor decisions. He’s selfish. He diminishes the value of his friends and their abilities. Basically, he’s a bully but he always feels bad about it later. So, I guess that excuses it…right? Hi, I see some domestic violence calls in Catboy’s future.

Now, onto the villains. Always my favorite part.

The clear winner in the villain category is Romeo. His plans to take over the world are bold, well thought out, and honestly on the level of a Bond villain. If he wasn’t such a pansy ass and continue to run away after the PJ Masks barely defeat him, he would be a great come from behind player to dominate the game. He stole their powers. He attacked them with his rotten egg/stinky machine. He’s constructed robots. He rewired the grid in the city to overtake it and put up flags of himself on every rooftop. Come on, if that isn’t Bond villain material, I don’t know what is.

What about the other two? They have to be good, right? Wrong.

First, Luna Girl is basically a thief. She is probably a kleptomaniac and could be brought back into a fold of a functioning society with a little behavioral therapy. Plus, her plans aren’t all that grand. She’s stolen a bunch of butterflies from the zoo to replace her moth helpers. She stole a hot air balloon so that others couldn’t enjoy themselves. Pretty menial and petty stuff. Not that inventive.

Then, the Night Ninja probably has a little histrionic personality disorder. Everything he does is about him and being the center of attention. He stole Gecko’s birthday cake and then made the ninjalinos celebrate his “birthday” instead. He stole the kids’ art projects and replaced them with his own. Honestly, I feel like if the parents in this city were paying more attention to their kids instead of whatever they hell they were doing, these kids wouldn’t be out all night. Just sayin’