Granny Panties

Today kids, we’re going to talk about an uncomfortable topic…underwear. Undies. Panties. Knickers. Lingerie. Drawers. Skivvies. Underthings. You know the things you wear under your pants.

I’ve lost about 30 lbs and now, all my underwear is ginormous (that’s me making up words again. I don’t care). Seriously, huge. Like the lace of the waist band is now safely hitting above my belly button and quite frankly out of my pants. They have become the dreaded granny panties.

I have a drawer full of underwear and hate ALL OF THEM. I hate shopping and I feel like buying underwear is stupid. You can’t try them on, cause that would be gross. Invariably, there is always something I hate about the fit; the elastic around the holes it too tight, the waistband is too low, the material is horrible, the fabric is scratchy (this one is for the fancy undies), they roll – and this is the worst. Standing there, talking to someone, as you move the waist of your underwear starts to slide down and all you want to do is reach in and pull them back up. But you can’t. You’re in public and it’s rude to reach into your pants in public…or so I’ve been told. #SorryNotSorry.

So, that’s my dilemma: stay with the granny panties that I already own or sink more money into undies that I’m going to hate.

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