This may be a short blog. A manifesto if you will but I think everyone needs to take a step back and look at their relationships every once in a while and decide if those relationships still work for you in the place you are now.
I’m 43 years old. I’m the type of person that’s always had a lot of aquaintences but not a lot of real friends. I generally have a handful of people that know me and are ride or die kind of people.
Covid changed all of that.
I realized that I was doing all the work for some of these relationships. I was the one making sure we had meeting times. That when we could go back to meeting in person, i was the one setting everything up. I was the one reaching out. I can’t do that anymore.
The added wrinkle is that because I’d been functioning in this role for so long, it was second nature to me until I stopped. I’d trained them to act this way, that I would be the one to set things up, to send that first text message. I will no longer be making that first move.
I am worth more than this. I will not be the one to do all the work for these friendships anymore. I would love to hang out with you, but you will need to reach out to me. I cannot be the only person making an effort in our relationship. It’s not healthy for my emotional health and I will be taking better care of myself from now on.
I highly recommend taking a hard look at your relationships and the role you play in them. Does this role still suit your needs? If not, its time to make a change.